another random image. chaoz on e train... hope this finally works
random bites
just testing this flickr nonsense. from my gmail to the flickr site which loads it automatically to blogger. nifty
in darkness she's all i see
today's monday. usually at this time i'm supposed to be in camp, probably sleeping. but sunday was just sooooooo long that i had to call my pc to give me a day off. because if i went back yesterday i probably would have fallen in the drain on the way back to camp or what. tired!
woke up sooo early yesterady at 6.30. actually that's the time i set the alarm for, but by the time i really got out it was 7.15am. decided to take the bus to church for rehearsal. the rehearsal was really messy because colin was going mad. he was ok on wednesday but somehow today he kept going "OK STOP! I THINK ITS LIKE THIS" which was getting quite annoying. and as well as a few others i wanted to do a full rundown of the songs, but in the end we only managed to practice the links. barely. and ping loong! hahahaha ping loong was really lost in the songs because one of the song starts with the 3rd beat and he just couldn't catch it for half an hour. so we were playing that song in a billion different ways so he could catch it. in the end colin and i clapped hands. hahahaha. after service paul told me that my eguit playing was really nice! which was a nice compliment to hear. however i didn't really play anything much at all, and when i asked him what was so nice about it he didn't really say anything. haha oh well.
cell group was pretty ok. i forgot to memorise the romans 12 chapter! i thought i was dead because everyone was memorising during service and having played eguit i kinda forgot. but by the time we went back to class only jeff and karl sort of knew. gep power. ha. and dominic printed the most biantai disgusting photo of me i've ever seen.
and gosh. beecky. now there's this thing going on that becky likes me. it's a bit scary too, because i'm her wallpaper and i'm her msn picture and small christine says she's always talking about me. what! but she's a really nice little girl and she's so cute too. like my nephew! but he's not really as cute as he was last month. heh it's like how puppies are kinda cute but when they grow up they look just ok.
checked out new creation church in the evening, at the 4.15pm service. the music! gosh the music was so good, it's like hearing a hillsongs album. the drums were miced up and everyone had monitors; the music team plays without looking at score sheets and the singers were so good. initially i was quite skeptical because i thought maybe this was one of those super charismatic emotional prosperity gospel churches, but it's not really that bad. the people do seem a lot more enthu tho. i've never seen like a thousand people raise up their hands while singing for example. and when the pastor says amen everyone's like AMEN which is super loud and wah basically everything's super loud i was going deaf. let alone the poor aunties over there.
the sermon was REALLY long. i was very tired by then, so i fell asleep like three times during the hour long sermon. and he talked about so many things it was hard to keep track. at laest the preacher is a lot better than my aussie church. they chose a really nice closing song, from 2 corinthians 1:17-24. i can still remember that wayyy long ago i think last year during christmas service, or was it watchnight? i asked sarah what all the 'yes lord yes yes yesyes' meant. luckily the pastor explained it really well, from scripture references.
went out with ems for out date at night. hahaha. 'DATE'. it was really corny we went to ichiban boshi at esplanade, which was surprisingly cheap. the decor and overall ambience was fantastic. but there was this waiter who was so blur he stood just three feet away from me but i was waving at him frantically and he didn't even notice.
dinner was pretty nice, except that the both of us were really full! went to the rooftop terrace because it was supposed to be a date so we went there walking around stoning looking at the couples. sigh we're like both single and lonely and thinking of our exs'. hilarious. so we walked around, pseudo-holding hands and counting the stars which was the lamest of lamest things. somehow emily's version of romantic involves lots of alcohol so we went down to harry's and got really wasted. because she was so sure about it, she said 'i bet i can drink more than all of you guys' and her friend was backing her up confidently. sigh so stupid, knowing my male diginity coming into play we went there and ordered like mad.
one mudslide, one flaming lambo, three barcadi 151s, one illusion (no idea whats that), i can't remember what else, and lots of peanuts. lots and lots. i was really quite upside down at the end but fortunately we were even. and i can drink more than shimin. which isn't really anything to be proud about. i think we should have just stayed at the rooftop, because the bill came up to 176. which was INSANE. at least i'm only paying half but still, it's such a waste of money.
when i went home i was so dead i used my idiotproof anti hangover procedure, which was really just to drink more water than a thirsty elephant. plus my mom got so mad. she said i was inconsiderate to my dad, who stayed up waiting to send me back to camp. but i called my pc in the cab to give me a day off, and when i told my mom that i wasn't going back to camp she got all flared up. so i feel so bad. really bad. sigh what's done is done anyway. there's no place for regrets in our world.
2cor1:17-24
God says yes and I know
That I'm blessed
Yes got a heart that's at rest
Yes and a future that's sealed
Yes if I'm healed then I'm healed
I'm not afraid of circumstances
'Cos I, I've already found the answers
In Christ all of God's promises
Are yes, yes and amen
woke up sooo early yesterady at 6.30. actually that's the time i set the alarm for, but by the time i really got out it was 7.15am. decided to take the bus to church for rehearsal. the rehearsal was really messy because colin was going mad. he was ok on wednesday but somehow today he kept going "OK STOP! I THINK ITS LIKE THIS" which was getting quite annoying. and as well as a few others i wanted to do a full rundown of the songs, but in the end we only managed to practice the links. barely. and ping loong! hahahaha ping loong was really lost in the songs because one of the song starts with the 3rd beat and he just couldn't catch it for half an hour. so we were playing that song in a billion different ways so he could catch it. in the end colin and i clapped hands. hahahaha. after service paul told me that my eguit playing was really nice! which was a nice compliment to hear. however i didn't really play anything much at all, and when i asked him what was so nice about it he didn't really say anything. haha oh well.
cell group was pretty ok. i forgot to memorise the romans 12 chapter! i thought i was dead because everyone was memorising during service and having played eguit i kinda forgot. but by the time we went back to class only jeff and karl sort of knew. gep power. ha. and dominic printed the most biantai disgusting photo of me i've ever seen.
and gosh. beecky. now there's this thing going on that becky likes me. it's a bit scary too, because i'm her wallpaper and i'm her msn picture and small christine says she's always talking about me. what! but she's a really nice little girl and she's so cute too. like my nephew! but he's not really as cute as he was last month. heh it's like how puppies are kinda cute but when they grow up they look just ok.
checked out new creation church in the evening, at the 4.15pm service. the music! gosh the music was so good, it's like hearing a hillsongs album. the drums were miced up and everyone had monitors; the music team plays without looking at score sheets and the singers were so good. initially i was quite skeptical because i thought maybe this was one of those super charismatic emotional prosperity gospel churches, but it's not really that bad. the people do seem a lot more enthu tho. i've never seen like a thousand people raise up their hands while singing for example. and when the pastor says amen everyone's like AMEN which is super loud and wah basically everything's super loud i was going deaf. let alone the poor aunties over there.
the sermon was REALLY long. i was very tired by then, so i fell asleep like three times during the hour long sermon. and he talked about so many things it was hard to keep track. at laest the preacher is a lot better than my aussie church. they chose a really nice closing song, from 2 corinthians 1:17-24. i can still remember that wayyy long ago i think last year during christmas service, or was it watchnight? i asked sarah what all the 'yes lord yes yes yesyes' meant. luckily the pastor explained it really well, from scripture references.
went out with ems for out date at night. hahaha. 'DATE'. it was really corny we went to ichiban boshi at esplanade, which was surprisingly cheap. the decor and overall ambience was fantastic. but there was this waiter who was so blur he stood just three feet away from me but i was waving at him frantically and he didn't even notice.
dinner was pretty nice, except that the both of us were really full! went to the rooftop terrace because it was supposed to be a date so we went there walking around stoning looking at the couples. sigh we're like both single and lonely and thinking of our exs'. hilarious. so we walked around, pseudo-holding hands and counting the stars which was the lamest of lamest things. somehow emily's version of romantic involves lots of alcohol so we went down to harry's and got really wasted. because she was so sure about it, she said 'i bet i can drink more than all of you guys' and her friend was backing her up confidently. sigh so stupid, knowing my male diginity coming into play we went there and ordered like mad.
one mudslide, one flaming lambo, three barcadi 151s, one illusion (no idea whats that), i can't remember what else, and lots of peanuts. lots and lots. i was really quite upside down at the end but fortunately we were even. and i can drink more than shimin. which isn't really anything to be proud about. i think we should have just stayed at the rooftop, because the bill came up to 176. which was INSANE. at least i'm only paying half but still, it's such a waste of money.
when i went home i was so dead i used my idiotproof anti hangover procedure, which was really just to drink more water than a thirsty elephant. plus my mom got so mad. she said i was inconsiderate to my dad, who stayed up waiting to send me back to camp. but i called my pc in the cab to give me a day off, and when i told my mom that i wasn't going back to camp she got all flared up. so i feel so bad. really bad. sigh what's done is done anyway. there's no place for regrets in our world.
2cor1:17-24
God says yes and I know
That I'm blessed
Yes got a heart that's at rest
Yes and a future that's sealed
Yes if I'm healed then I'm healed
I'm not afraid of circumstances
'Cos I, I've already found the answers
In Christ all of God's promises
Are yes, yes and amen
forget it. forgetit. forgetit. forgetit
29 January 2005
i'm wondering,
dreaming of brighter days and happier ways
to forget that i really love you
dreaming of brighter days and happier ways
to forget that i really love you
Your webshots: 275 views this week
hmm usually it's like zero. haha i'm wondering who on earth and what pictures they're looking at. somehow it's a bit weird to think that someone you have no clue about knowing so much about what's happening in your life. but that's what the internet is all about.
went walking around orchard in the evening with jon chan looking for clothes to buy. maybe i'm just really too fussy but i walked around the whole of taka and couldn't really find anything to my fancy. in the end chanced upon a lilac shirt at british india, which was terribly expensive but somehow i thought it looked quite nice. now i'm really feeling broke. i think it's probably the most expensive shirt ever bought. hmm i'll wear it to our so called 'date' with emily on sunday. that stupid woman is always asking me out but when i'm finally free today she says 'no'.
last night was really creepy. had all these crazy dreams. at night i dreamt of somethign about becky and sarah was in it too. it was really really scary. the kind of dream where you just feel like jumping out of but when i woke up, my eyes just opened but my heart was 'half-pounding'. can't really remember what happened because i woke up in a daze at 0530 for the morning run.
then after the gongfu lesson i went back to sleep and i had the weirdest dream about christine which was really weird but somehow it was pretty nice too. but the worst part was that it was in this screwed up version of my bunk which suddenly looked all posh and styled like an office. but it got interupted by my growling stomach halfway because i woke up at 2pm+ and realised that i had skipped lunch and somehow almost everybody was gone. the downside of sleeping too much.
people say dreams show what you really feel inside at times, your emotions that you never sort of managed to express. but i'm sitting here wondering how it could ever be that way. it was like that yesterday too. creepy.
hmm usually it's like zero. haha i'm wondering who on earth and what pictures they're looking at. somehow it's a bit weird to think that someone you have no clue about knowing so much about what's happening in your life. but that's what the internet is all about.
went walking around orchard in the evening with jon chan looking for clothes to buy. maybe i'm just really too fussy but i walked around the whole of taka and couldn't really find anything to my fancy. in the end chanced upon a lilac shirt at british india, which was terribly expensive but somehow i thought it looked quite nice. now i'm really feeling broke. i think it's probably the most expensive shirt ever bought. hmm i'll wear it to our so called 'date' with emily on sunday. that stupid woman is always asking me out but when i'm finally free today she says 'no'.
last night was really creepy. had all these crazy dreams. at night i dreamt of somethign about becky and sarah was in it too. it was really really scary. the kind of dream where you just feel like jumping out of but when i woke up, my eyes just opened but my heart was 'half-pounding'. can't really remember what happened because i woke up in a daze at 0530 for the morning run.
then after the gongfu lesson i went back to sleep and i had the weirdest dream about christine which was really weird but somehow it was pretty nice too. but the worst part was that it was in this screwed up version of my bunk which suddenly looked all posh and styled like an office. but it got interupted by my growling stomach halfway because i woke up at 2pm+ and realised that i had skipped lunch and somehow almost everybody was gone. the downside of sleeping too much.
people say dreams show what you really feel inside at times, your emotions that you never sort of managed to express. but i'm sitting here wondering how it could ever be that way. it was like that yesterday too. creepy.
28 January 2005
it's 12.15am and just got back from swensens with diana and cheryl's gang (who happen to be yijun diana daphne tiff eric erwin who's quite cool and cheryl) the apple crumble's really good! but i think i had a bit too much to eat AGAIN, because prior to that tousif, farhan and i stopped by coffee bean behind borders which had such a lacklustre ambience and looked, literally, dead.
messaged christine at 2pm, asking her if she was free to go out for dinner or post-dinner or at anytime at all. gave the typical no, though. sigh.
really looking forward to sunday, as i usually do with all things pleasent and beautiful. asked the cheryl gang whether they wanted to come. i hope they do; maybe they can comment on how my church is then.
also really should start actually training now, isntead of sitting by the poolside feeling too lazy to swim. waking up at 0530 tomorrow for a run; i'll try to make it at least 5km in 25 minutes (boots and lack of sleep included). it's part of my 2004 goal to start triathlons, but since buying a bike is really out of my league right now i'll just start with the swim/run. haven't been running distance for two to three months so i think i'll probably just die. and swimming. gosh don't talk about swimming. i need to get my 50free around 27seconds (just so i can beat jon chan's 'slow' 28). at least today i got it to 30-31s.
life's back to the live-it-for-the-moment mode, which is really quite acceptable. leaves things a bit lackadaisical, a little bit unmotivated. but after all, these things are really all in the mind, the emotional intangible realm. and i'm ok, i really am. i'm always ok.
messaged christine at 2pm, asking her if she was free to go out for dinner or post-dinner or at anytime at all. gave the typical no, though. sigh.
really looking forward to sunday, as i usually do with all things pleasent and beautiful. asked the cheryl gang whether they wanted to come. i hope they do; maybe they can comment on how my church is then.
also really should start actually training now, isntead of sitting by the poolside feeling too lazy to swim. waking up at 0530 tomorrow for a run; i'll try to make it at least 5km in 25 minutes (boots and lack of sleep included). it's part of my 2004 goal to start triathlons, but since buying a bike is really out of my league right now i'll just start with the swim/run. haven't been running distance for two to three months so i think i'll probably just die. and swimming. gosh don't talk about swimming. i need to get my 50free around 27seconds (just so i can beat jon chan's 'slow' 28). at least today i got it to 30-31s.
life's back to the live-it-for-the-moment mode, which is really quite acceptable. leaves things a bit lackadaisical, a little bit unmotivated. but after all, these things are really all in the mind, the emotional intangible realm. and i'm ok, i really am. i'm always ok.
27 January 2005
wow worship practice was really great! all the instruments sort of clicked together and it sounded beautiful. the song choice was fun too and yet it was really easy to play! lol ok maybe only for me because as eguit i really just play some mumbo jumbo trash. but i thought that the practice was supposed to start at 8.30pm but it was actually 7.30! so blur so at 7.45 i called becky but she didn't answer so i had to call wayne to get colin's number. and rushed down all the way to school. heh luckily they were just done setting up.
becky was so funny she kept laughing nonstop. and everyone was like 'shuddup!' but she kept on laughing like a mad clown.
ok. so here i am now in camp again, not out clubbing or having fun. but i'm gonna do my qt soon and read rick warren's 'purpose-driven life'. i'm a changed person, lol. really!
sigh. it's been a really long day. but unlike other days of past, it was great :)
becky was so funny she kept laughing nonstop. and everyone was like 'shuddup!' but she kept on laughing like a mad clown.
ok. so here i am now in camp again, not out clubbing or having fun. but i'm gonna do my qt soon and read rick warren's 'purpose-driven life'. i'm a changed person, lol. really!
sigh. it's been a really long day. but unlike other days of past, it was great :)
26 January 2005
just came back from e orchard outing with jane. bumped into william chan and rajiv! and william's suchhhh a bad influence i should never ever talk to him again. at least he's not as retarded as last time and he actually is really grown up.
anyway had lunch at borders bistro AGAIN; had the prawn spaghetti this time which was quite ok. after that i was dreaming of eating pizza so the both of us went over to california pizza kitchen at forum but it costs like, $20 for one pizza! and i was a little stuffed for an entire pizza alone because jane didn't want any. stupid. so in the end we walked around till mccafe at shaw and had muffins and coffee. it's really not that bad at all for a mackers snack, lol.
THEN went inside to isetan because they were having the hokkaido fair and i just had to buy something so i bought some of that roe mixed with herring thing which was rather nice. but a bit too cold. gosh so much food. to add to that, just before i went home we stopped by isetan again and got a $30 BENTO BOX which was one half ikura and one half sea urchin. yummy! but freak it's like how expensive. to add to that i had to top up my ezlink card with twenty bucks and bought some more hair wax which was another ten dollars. man i don't even want to think of how much i spent today.
just surfed some friendster because i was really totally bored, also besides the fact that millions of people are mailing me about this hi5 rubbish and i think one such service is really more than enough. and too my surprise i realised how many friendster messages i didn't even reply to! there's one from jon's girlfiend, quite a couple from my ac secondary school friends, two from shane, and a billion from indo girls looking to be my 'friend'. hmm but the last one was from november last year, guess they stopped bothering to message me already. which is good to an extent, not to be mean but because i hate frienster messages.
going for worship prac later. man it only starts at 8.30, which is so late! and it ends at 9.45, which is also SO early. becky will be there! :) somehow some people think that she likes me i like her, which i think is totally ridiculous. but it's pretty sad that dom's given up on her so easily, seeing how he was so infatuated over her.
decided against going clubbing already, firstly because nobody really wants to go and secondly because i myself don't really want to go. because i'll probably do all the bad crap there and waste tons of money at the same time. so i'll most likely stay in camp, read self help books (!!!!), have some quiet time and listen to dave matthews.
if i ever have a band, i'll want them to groove as well as dmb and matchbox 20 combined. pump up the volume, close the door and just feel your body move to the rhythm it's so beautiful, this music.
some things to do in case i ever get really bored:
learn bass
figure out computer mixing (it's really wayy too technical)
quit smoking (ok this is already almost on the 'done' list)
save money
go swimming more
actually RUN once in a while. for a distance more than 1km! (totally bummed out)
anyway had lunch at borders bistro AGAIN; had the prawn spaghetti this time which was quite ok. after that i was dreaming of eating pizza so the both of us went over to california pizza kitchen at forum but it costs like, $20 for one pizza! and i was a little stuffed for an entire pizza alone because jane didn't want any. stupid. so in the end we walked around till mccafe at shaw and had muffins and coffee. it's really not that bad at all for a mackers snack, lol.
THEN went inside to isetan because they were having the hokkaido fair and i just had to buy something so i bought some of that roe mixed with herring thing which was rather nice. but a bit too cold. gosh so much food. to add to that, just before i went home we stopped by isetan again and got a $30 BENTO BOX which was one half ikura and one half sea urchin. yummy! but freak it's like how expensive. to add to that i had to top up my ezlink card with twenty bucks and bought some more hair wax which was another ten dollars. man i don't even want to think of how much i spent today.
just surfed some friendster because i was really totally bored, also besides the fact that millions of people are mailing me about this hi5 rubbish and i think one such service is really more than enough. and too my surprise i realised how many friendster messages i didn't even reply to! there's one from jon's girlfiend, quite a couple from my ac secondary school friends, two from shane, and a billion from indo girls looking to be my 'friend'. hmm but the last one was from november last year, guess they stopped bothering to message me already. which is good to an extent, not to be mean but because i hate frienster messages.
going for worship prac later. man it only starts at 8.30, which is so late! and it ends at 9.45, which is also SO early. becky will be there! :) somehow some people think that she likes me i like her, which i think is totally ridiculous. but it's pretty sad that dom's given up on her so easily, seeing how he was so infatuated over her.
decided against going clubbing already, firstly because nobody really wants to go and secondly because i myself don't really want to go. because i'll probably do all the bad crap there and waste tons of money at the same time. so i'll most likely stay in camp, read self help books (!!!!), have some quiet time and listen to dave matthews.
if i ever have a band, i'll want them to groove as well as dmb and matchbox 20 combined. pump up the volume, close the door and just feel your body move to the rhythm it's so beautiful, this music.
some things to do in case i ever get really bored:
learn bass
figure out computer mixing (it's really wayy too technical)
quit smoking (ok this is already almost on the 'done' list)
save money
go swimming more
actually RUN once in a while. for a distance more than 1km! (totally bummed out)
hey life goes on
See, you and me
Have a better time than most can dream
Have it better than the best
And so can pull on through
Whatever tears at us
Whatever holds us down
And if nothing can be done
We'll make the best of what's around
Turns out not where but who you're with
That really matters
And hurts not much when you're around
If you hold on tight
To what you think is your thing
You may find you're missing all the rest
She run up into the light surprised
Her arms are open
Her mind's eye is
Turns out not where but what you think
That really matters
And hurts not much when you're around
going to meet jane at orchard later. to follow me shopping and just to plain chill out. i really don't want her to go back to australia; she's one of the few people that i can really talk to about anything and everything from the ridiculously stupid to the really serious events. just wondering what irvine (irving? irvin? i can't remember), her over-possesive nutter ex boyfriend will say when she gets back.
last week i missed out on getting my share of dave matthews songs; today i'm fully stocked! i'll probably go out and buy their cds later but i sort of downloaded all the nicest ones already. but hey if i pay for the cds, it's still fair, right? but i'll see about it because i'm kinda running short nowadays. hmmm...
going for practice later after dinner. i still don't know if i'm going clubbing. not really in that sort of mood, but maybe if good friends are going i might consider. won't smoke won't drink maybe just coke. actually i just want to sleep. sigh so tired but fortunately armys good training for all things tired, like it is itself. if you really know what i mean.
Have a better time than most can dream
Have it better than the best
And so can pull on through
Whatever tears at us
Whatever holds us down
And if nothing can be done
We'll make the best of what's around
Turns out not where but who you're with
That really matters
And hurts not much when you're around
If you hold on tight
To what you think is your thing
You may find you're missing all the rest
She run up into the light surprised
Her arms are open
Her mind's eye is
Turns out not where but what you think
That really matters
And hurts not much when you're around
going to meet jane at orchard later. to follow me shopping and just to plain chill out. i really don't want her to go back to australia; she's one of the few people that i can really talk to about anything and everything from the ridiculously stupid to the really serious events. just wondering what irvine (irving? irvin? i can't remember), her over-possesive nutter ex boyfriend will say when she gets back.
last week i missed out on getting my share of dave matthews songs; today i'm fully stocked! i'll probably go out and buy their cds later but i sort of downloaded all the nicest ones already. but hey if i pay for the cds, it's still fair, right? but i'll see about it because i'm kinda running short nowadays. hmmm...
going for practice later after dinner. i still don't know if i'm going clubbing. not really in that sort of mood, but maybe if good friends are going i might consider. won't smoke won't drink maybe just coke. actually i just want to sleep. sigh so tired but fortunately armys good training for all things tired, like it is itself. if you really know what i mean.
24 January 2005
to buy list:
shoes
uptown casual brown shoe
stylish sneakers
running shoes - check
shirts
uneven stripes - white green
some floral stuff. light.
one darkish shirt, maroon. more suited for clubbing purposes
big buckle belt
got out today at around 8am. rushed down to holland village public pool to do a couple of laps. stupid bus took so long to get there! so buy the time i reached it was around 8.50am. so only managed to do like 20-25 laps but there was this really chio bikini babe in the pool. it was hard to swim. hahaha. but she could swim! she swam as fast as the other guys in the pool and she had a nice body. and the best part was that she was chio; she wore funky earings too. while swimming!!
church.. didnt really pay attention to the sermon, was sort of reading my own stuff. which was bad. and then we were supposed to cancel cell an just go makan but then george dragged us up again. hehe. we had this really weird talk about nothing much before closing off really early and when we were all supposed to pray, i said this prayer. which i really said for me. that nobody how heavy our burdens, how deep our problems, how futile and how hopeless that i would just lift it up to my lord. because just like the women who touched the cloak and was healed by just believing, really we should just believe that we have what we seek and we will. at least we will have what god intented for us.
after church was supposed to meet diana. who was DEAD BORED, according to darling christine. but YAH, in total suay-ness she had to pangseh me to go to her grandma's place. so in the end went lunch with sarah/jerm, then to sarah's house. she was supposed to study but in the end she realised that she didnt have the keys. so dumb. and she didn't study! at least she's studying more, so that's great and considering this is THE A LEVELS. i remember last year all my friends were going insane studying for their own a's. so since sarah didn't have the keys jerm and i rotted in the so called void deck of her condo which was really quite nice to relax. later we went up to play ps2. haha somehow it's just not as fun as playing it in camp. i don't know why either.
after that, jerm left and sarah and i went to leon's house (sarah's so called 'eyecandy' aka botb band mate). they were really not bad! the singer, tim and the drummer leon's really good. the bassist was really blur and cute, like those south park kids. but they chose a 'live' version of sunday morning which wasn't as layered as the studio one, therefore it sounded 'just like the mp3'. but sounding the same as the mp3 isn't really that special imo if the mp3 isn't really that great. which i think wasn't. haha but the piano and sax solos are nice, so i'll give it to them. if only my bro could play the bass... it'd be so cool haha. with his funky metro clothes to fit the bill.
went shopping, if you actually can call it that at coronation plaza after. bought a new shaver and cream just for the sake of it, some sushi (i'm a pig). wanted to buy new magazines, but the store was closed and men's health is really one of the local wannabe men's fashion magazines that just don't cut it. went for a haircut at the malay barber, who was surprisingly attentive today. i thought it's really good for a $10 haircut... lol i had to guide him all the way through the process which is called 'cutting chris ong's hair' though. haha. poor guy.
also had a talk with debbie on msn. she told me soooo many things i didn't know; most of them related to people in our cell group. about who's liking who and who liked who, and this person that person. lol did i really not pay attention to church at all last year...?
back to camp now. had some abalone for dinner (yum). just need to shower. bleah. aND SHIT i forgot to buy dmb cds and forgot to borrow the dmb 'crash' cd from sarah and forgot to download songs! so i don't have any new dmb songs! -really sad-
shoes
uptown casual brown shoe
stylish sneakers
running shoes - check
shirts
uneven stripes - white green
some floral stuff. light.
one darkish shirt, maroon. more suited for clubbing purposes
big buckle belt
got out today at around 8am. rushed down to holland village public pool to do a couple of laps. stupid bus took so long to get there! so buy the time i reached it was around 8.50am. so only managed to do like 20-25 laps but there was this really chio bikini babe in the pool. it was hard to swim. hahaha. but she could swim! she swam as fast as the other guys in the pool and she had a nice body. and the best part was that she was chio; she wore funky earings too. while swimming!!
church.. didnt really pay attention to the sermon, was sort of reading my own stuff. which was bad. and then we were supposed to cancel cell an just go makan but then george dragged us up again. hehe. we had this really weird talk about nothing much before closing off really early and when we were all supposed to pray, i said this prayer. which i really said for me. that nobody how heavy our burdens, how deep our problems, how futile and how hopeless that i would just lift it up to my lord. because just like the women who touched the cloak and was healed by just believing, really we should just believe that we have what we seek and we will. at least we will have what god intented for us.
after church was supposed to meet diana. who was DEAD BORED, according to darling christine. but YAH, in total suay-ness she had to pangseh me to go to her grandma's place. so in the end went lunch with sarah/jerm, then to sarah's house. she was supposed to study but in the end she realised that she didnt have the keys. so dumb. and she didn't study! at least she's studying more, so that's great and considering this is THE A LEVELS. i remember last year all my friends were going insane studying for their own a's. so since sarah didn't have the keys jerm and i rotted in the so called void deck of her condo which was really quite nice to relax. later we went up to play ps2. haha somehow it's just not as fun as playing it in camp. i don't know why either.
after that, jerm left and sarah and i went to leon's house (sarah's so called 'eyecandy' aka botb band mate). they were really not bad! the singer, tim and the drummer leon's really good. the bassist was really blur and cute, like those south park kids. but they chose a 'live' version of sunday morning which wasn't as layered as the studio one, therefore it sounded 'just like the mp3'. but sounding the same as the mp3 isn't really that special imo if the mp3 isn't really that great. which i think wasn't. haha but the piano and sax solos are nice, so i'll give it to them. if only my bro could play the bass... it'd be so cool haha. with his funky metro clothes to fit the bill.
went shopping, if you actually can call it that at coronation plaza after. bought a new shaver and cream just for the sake of it, some sushi (i'm a pig). wanted to buy new magazines, but the store was closed and men's health is really one of the local wannabe men's fashion magazines that just don't cut it. went for a haircut at the malay barber, who was surprisingly attentive today. i thought it's really good for a $10 haircut... lol i had to guide him all the way through the process which is called 'cutting chris ong's hair' though. haha. poor guy.
also had a talk with debbie on msn. she told me soooo many things i didn't know; most of them related to people in our cell group. about who's liking who and who liked who, and this person that person. lol did i really not pay attention to church at all last year...?
back to camp now. had some abalone for dinner (yum). just need to shower. bleah. aND SHIT i forgot to buy dmb cds and forgot to borrow the dmb 'crash' cd from sarah and forgot to download songs! so i don't have any new dmb songs! -really sad-
23 January 2005
web messenger doesn't work anymore, so i'm resorting to using e-messenger.net which is this really crappy online msn clone. you have to click the refresh button just to see if the person has replied, so sometimes i have to refresh loads of times if my friends take really long to reply, or if i forget to refresh they get pissed because i wouldn't know better if they had replied.
ok it's 1hour 29minutes to a new week :) but i'll be in church so early and there's really no point going back home before church, because i'll have to go back to church the moment i actually reach home anyway. so i've decided to go running, since it's been ages the last time i ran. initially i wanted to run 20x400m in all but i realised that i'd probably die halfway. so i'm cutting it down to 16x400 which is only about 5+km. but high intensity... lol die la. i hope my throat can take it.
waiting on an angel
one to carry me home
hope you come to see me soon
'cause i don't want to walk alone
no i don't want to walk alone
ok it's 1hour 29minutes to a new week :) but i'll be in church so early and there's really no point going back home before church, because i'll have to go back to church the moment i actually reach home anyway. so i've decided to go running, since it's been ages the last time i ran. initially i wanted to run 20x400m in all but i realised that i'd probably die halfway. so i'm cutting it down to 16x400 which is only about 5+km. but high intensity... lol die la. i hope my throat can take it.
waiting on an angel
one to carry me home
hope you come to see me soon
'cause i don't want to walk alone
no i don't want to walk alone
22 January 2005
"This page is temporarily unavailable. "
sheesh msn web messenger has been screwed up all day. -insert angry words here-
dave matthews band is a really nice band. heh i think when i book out on tuesday (perhaps maybe sunday instead) i'll go out and buy every single cd. first one would be 'under the table and dreaming' because apparently everyone on the dmb forums says it's so great. and i spent the entire afternoon playing 'satellite'. just because i could. hahaha. the time signature changes every verse/chorus/bridge and then some, and the lyrics are all on the off beats. but it's just such a nice song.
sheesh msn web messenger has been screwed up all day. -insert angry words here-
dave matthews band is a really nice band. heh i think when i book out on tuesday (perhaps maybe sunday instead) i'll go out and buy every single cd. first one would be 'under the table and dreaming' because apparently everyone on the dmb forums says it's so great. and i spent the entire afternoon playing 'satellite'. just because i could. hahaha. the time signature changes every verse/chorus/bridge and then some, and the lyrics are all on the off beats. but it's just such a nice song.
overslept lunch. heh didn't even bother to go down to the cookhouse; after all there's really nobody there to usher around and the allure of better food than myojo tom yam noodles couldn't pull me out of my sofa. chucked the rest of the fags into the box as well; realised that if i was going to quit anytime soon i might as well start now. and it's not like i'm going to be digging in the trash anytime soon either - ciggies soaked in tom yam soup doesn't sound too appetizing.
the buildings outside don't look that great in the afternoon (the sunlight's too harsh). but they still frame the sky in a way that makes looking at the sky for half an hour not seem like such a silly idea.
back to sleep lol.
the buildings outside don't look that great in the afternoon (the sunlight's too harsh). but they still frame the sky in a way that makes looking at the sky for half an hour not seem like such a silly idea.
back to sleep lol.
COS on a saturday
stoning in the office again on a saturday morning. which would usually be bad, however today it's really good because i get to go home tomorrow while everyone else in my coy will still have to go to the range (lest the get marksman, which i reckon would be near impossible). ok perhaps not go home; i think i'll only go home for dinner before heading back to camp.
i was sitting outside the office on the couch (really, there's a couch outside my office. heh there's sofas everywhere in my company) looking at the way the light falls on the buildings, the beautiful blue sky, the way the clouds form; so ethereal. perhaps in times like these do i enjoy the solitude, the peace of mind, looking at the grand world god created as if i'm not really here. the feeling is akin to waking up on a cold winter morning, with sunshine's warmth beaming through the window on to my frigid body, neatly tucked under the woolen blanket. it's really so contrasting to my turbid, maundering condition of late.
i reckon i'd be blogging a lot today, for there's really nothing to do except bask in my reclusion.
i was sitting outside the office on the couch (really, there's a couch outside my office. heh there's sofas everywhere in my company) looking at the way the light falls on the buildings, the beautiful blue sky, the way the clouds form; so ethereal. perhaps in times like these do i enjoy the solitude, the peace of mind, looking at the grand world god created as if i'm not really here. the feeling is akin to waking up on a cold winter morning, with sunshine's warmth beaming through the window on to my frigid body, neatly tucked under the woolen blanket. it's really so contrasting to my turbid, maundering condition of late.
i reckon i'd be blogging a lot today, for there's really nothing to do except bask in my reclusion.
chris. says:
its like
*loved [all i need] says:
like?
chris. says:
ok i really miss her. heh maybe you could say the companionship
*loved [all i need] says:
but you dont like her
chris. says:
you know in school people go out hang around class outing this sort of stuff
*loved [all i need] says:
omgosh it's exactly the same thing as what my friend's going through
chris. says:
dont omgosh me lah come on
*loved [all i need] says:
serious!
chris. says:
but i didnt have any of that i only went out with her
chris. says:
and i didnt really hang out with anyone at all except her
chris. says:
for almost like all my secondary schl life. dont count pri school lah thats crap
chris. says:
then i went to australia and she's gone suddenly you feel all alone. because you never really clung on to any friends except the one who just left
chris. says:
and i had to go to aus so all the people in singapore are not around either anymore. save you jon chan some other people
chris. says:
and my best friends clique, buddies if you call it, they're not exactly great friends who stick around for you all the time. but we party a lot thats about it. save jon chan
chris. says:
so now i have no friends. like good ones. its not really important bu you know how you feel like so alone
chris. says:
and if you watch that dumb movie. it's about this guy who's a player but after he left a girl all he really wanted was the companionship. because he really had no friends either
chris. says:
and her name WAS NIKKI
chris. says:
its not like 'go make more friends lah' because don't cell people wouldn't understand. i can read people in this way at least i know jeremy sort of gets it thats why i was talking to him today
chris. says:
and you get it too. i hope
chris. says:
and jon chan who's my best friend of best friend gets it but i dont want to stress him too much on my crap because hes gonna have to leave his gf soon becase she's going overseas. and i know how shit he'll feel after hanging around with her for 4 years so i dont tell him anything of this sort.
chris. says:
yah. all that.
chris. says:
and then some
chris. says:
so you know smoking is a depressent just like alcohol is and in australia i used to drink like shit shit shit so now i smoke but at elast i'm quitting right. and smoking itself is so screwed up. so thats another screw up
chris. says:
and army friends. army friends aren't friends on weekends because we have this thing thats common among all army people. jeff might understand later. they just dont want to hear from any other army person on weekends at all. so we're weekday friends
chris. says:
so i'm left with no friends
chris. says:
and thats the truth. which is really damn sad. which wouldnt' be like that if i went to australia
chris. says:
*if i didnt go to australia
*loved [all i need] says:
i'm your friend!
*loved [all i need] says:
jeremy's your new found friend
*loved [all i need] says:
: )
chris. says:
he's not my new found friend we were always good friends. becuase i stayed in his dorm and we had a bit in common, girl-friend wise
chris. says:
actually i thought he was like jeff who i totally do not understand but after meeting him there he's actually this super buayah haha but he had this gf since sec school which was just like me and nobody knew. so its something in common
chris. says:
ok not like i'm super buayah. i'm not ok... lol so thats not in common
*loved [all i need] says:
no lah but then you told me that you guys werent very close what
chris. says:
yah not very
*loved [all i need] says:
hah you are
chris. says:
but cell grp wise... yah we're REALLY close. lol. so you see its like how fake
chris. says:
what! its how annoying thats what everyone says. but because in australia i have no guy friends at all because my school has so few guys and those that are my friends didnt really bother being my friends at all.
*loved [all i need] says:
huh?
chris. says:
what huh
*loved [all i need] says:
huh i'm confused but i get the gist
*loved [all i need] says:
then hang out with the girls lah!
*loved [all i need] says:
maybe cuz you dont bother either
chris. says:
i do. i tried quite hard but my mom told me not to bother with people who dont bother about you.
*loved [all i need] says:
whattttttt
*loved [all i need] says:
dont listen to her
chris. says:
i went to jio them soccer basketball go school together even to the extent of playing cs together. and i really hate playing lan
*loved [all i need] says:
dont do something that you dont wanna do lah
chris. says:
but all they wanted to do was rot in their stupid rooms of theirs and they didnt even care if i was happy sad bored stressed. who needs these kind of friends
chris. says:
yah i dont want to be friends with people who dont give a shit
chris. says:
i thought it was crap but really after years everything my mom ever says is true. so i listen to her nowadays. lol
chris. says:
you shouldn't bother with people who don't bother about you. listen, it'll do you good. like why ever love someone who'll never think of giving their heart to you
*loved [all i need] says:
ya but first you shd try right
chris. says:
i did, not like i didnt. come on did you read what i wrote
*loved [all i need] says:
hmmm
hmm ok actually today wasn't that bad lots of things happened. went out with the aussie peeps in the afternoon after lunch/brunch at east ocean for dim sum which was great btw. anyway went out with them then later went to holland v for dom's bday/cell outing. but i smoked a bit so that's bad. and a few other screw ups happened.
i think i should pray more. god's supposed to help in this kinda stuff so i guess i'll just leave it all up to him. thankfully he gave me some friends who can sort of understand how i feel. but ok lah, if god can do anything at all i'm sure he can help me out of this crap hole. thanks in advance
its like
*loved [all i need] says:
like?
chris. says:
ok i really miss her. heh maybe you could say the companionship
*loved [all i need] says:
but you dont like her
chris. says:
you know in school people go out hang around class outing this sort of stuff
*loved [all i need] says:
omgosh it's exactly the same thing as what my friend's going through
chris. says:
dont omgosh me lah come on
*loved [all i need] says:
serious!
chris. says:
but i didnt have any of that i only went out with her
chris. says:
and i didnt really hang out with anyone at all except her
chris. says:
for almost like all my secondary schl life. dont count pri school lah thats crap
chris. says:
then i went to australia and she's gone suddenly you feel all alone. because you never really clung on to any friends except the one who just left
chris. says:
and i had to go to aus so all the people in singapore are not around either anymore. save you jon chan some other people
chris. says:
and my best friends clique, buddies if you call it, they're not exactly great friends who stick around for you all the time. but we party a lot thats about it. save jon chan
chris. says:
so now i have no friends. like good ones. its not really important bu you know how you feel like so alone
chris. says:
and if you watch that dumb movie. it's about this guy who's a player but after he left a girl all he really wanted was the companionship. because he really had no friends either
chris. says:
and her name WAS NIKKI
chris. says:
its not like 'go make more friends lah' because don't cell people wouldn't understand. i can read people in this way at least i know jeremy sort of gets it thats why i was talking to him today
chris. says:
and you get it too. i hope
chris. says:
and jon chan who's my best friend of best friend gets it but i dont want to stress him too much on my crap because hes gonna have to leave his gf soon becase she's going overseas. and i know how shit he'll feel after hanging around with her for 4 years so i dont tell him anything of this sort.
chris. says:
yah. all that.
chris. says:
and then some
chris. says:
so you know smoking is a depressent just like alcohol is and in australia i used to drink like shit shit shit so now i smoke but at elast i'm quitting right. and smoking itself is so screwed up. so thats another screw up
chris. says:
and army friends. army friends aren't friends on weekends because we have this thing thats common among all army people. jeff might understand later. they just dont want to hear from any other army person on weekends at all. so we're weekday friends
chris. says:
so i'm left with no friends
chris. says:
and thats the truth. which is really damn sad. which wouldnt' be like that if i went to australia
chris. says:
*if i didnt go to australia
*loved [all i need] says:
i'm your friend!
*loved [all i need] says:
jeremy's your new found friend
*loved [all i need] says:
: )
chris. says:
he's not my new found friend we were always good friends. becuase i stayed in his dorm and we had a bit in common, girl-friend wise
chris. says:
actually i thought he was like jeff who i totally do not understand but after meeting him there he's actually this super buayah haha but he had this gf since sec school which was just like me and nobody knew. so its something in common
chris. says:
ok not like i'm super buayah. i'm not ok... lol so thats not in common
*loved [all i need] says:
no lah but then you told me that you guys werent very close what
chris. says:
yah not very
*loved [all i need] says:
hah you are
chris. says:
but cell grp wise... yah we're REALLY close. lol. so you see its like how fake
chris. says:
what! its how annoying thats what everyone says. but because in australia i have no guy friends at all because my school has so few guys and those that are my friends didnt really bother being my friends at all.
*loved [all i need] says:
huh?
chris. says:
what huh
*loved [all i need] says:
huh i'm confused but i get the gist
*loved [all i need] says:
then hang out with the girls lah!
*loved [all i need] says:
maybe cuz you dont bother either
chris. says:
i do. i tried quite hard but my mom told me not to bother with people who dont bother about you.
*loved [all i need] says:
whattttttt
*loved [all i need] says:
dont listen to her
chris. says:
i went to jio them soccer basketball go school together even to the extent of playing cs together. and i really hate playing lan
*loved [all i need] says:
dont do something that you dont wanna do lah
chris. says:
but all they wanted to do was rot in their stupid rooms of theirs and they didnt even care if i was happy sad bored stressed. who needs these kind of friends
chris. says:
yah i dont want to be friends with people who dont give a shit
chris. says:
i thought it was crap but really after years everything my mom ever says is true. so i listen to her nowadays. lol
chris. says:
you shouldn't bother with people who don't bother about you. listen, it'll do you good. like why ever love someone who'll never think of giving their heart to you
*loved [all i need] says:
ya but first you shd try right
chris. says:
i did, not like i didnt. come on did you read what i wrote
*loved [all i need] says:
hmmm
hmm ok actually today wasn't that bad lots of things happened. went out with the aussie peeps in the afternoon after lunch/brunch at east ocean for dim sum which was great btw. anyway went out with them then later went to holland v for dom's bday/cell outing. but i smoked a bit so that's bad. and a few other screw ups happened.
i think i should pray more. god's supposed to help in this kinda stuff so i guess i'll just leave it all up to him. thankfully he gave me some friends who can sort of understand how i feel. but ok lah, if god can do anything at all i'm sure he can help me out of this crap hole. thanks in advance
do i need to close my eyes to see the sunshine
21 January 2005
dear blogger
i feel so screwed up. rather, i am really screwed up. everyone's right. somehow i put on this fake outer layer all the time and feel so obgliged to show that i'm this nice person who does his best, tries to study (at least during the schooling days), but inside it's all upside down.
watched alfie today. which i think was actually a very good movie. but it really pulled my strings, brought up some serious memories. i'm living my life in denial; it's over 2 years but whenever someone says her name i just can't help but think about it. i think this is what happens when you really love someone, or rather loved. and her name was printed all over it. the characters screenwise and in reality were so similar too, not literally but figuratively (you know what i mean). but nowadays we've become so distant and pseudo-friendly; i thought maybe we did recently become friends again but in reality we're nothing but strangers. and that ever since that day i asked her out (purely for the sake of old friends) has she stopped talking to me. and really, i think so hard and wrench my heart for a reason or excuse when really it's staring right at me in the face, that i'm nothing but an obstacle to get over; a defect on an otherwise perfect surface. and i don't deserve to be there. and two years hasn't let me accept that fate yet.
thankfully after the show diana, who is just the nicest friend in the world, gave in and followed me for supper because i was just wandering orchard road aimlessly because i wasn't ready to go home yet. silly i know, but i just wanted some space.
and it led me back to the beginning which is studying overseas. and again i'm telling myself, why did i really have to go there to study? and again i'm fooling myself, that maybe if i really did go to jc it wouldn't have to be this way. and perhaps i'd just be in bmt now, too tired to think about anything else that could clog up my head. yes, it's really stupid to think about the past; to regret life's past; but the words come so easy and yet the actions so hesitant.
there's also this person i like (which denial tells me i don't). but i don't want to think about it. too much thinking will really kill a person.
my spiritual life is also stalling. for the past 2 months it has been quite improved, but nowadays i just read the passage and fall asleep as soon as i'm done. i don't really think about it much; maybe because i'm lazy or that these burdens seem like a mountain next to the rock that's apparently God. i do pray, selfishly at times but they don't seem to be having any effect. right, the bible says that the faithful will be blessed, but i'm only human. help me believe that you're with me, even at those times when it seems like i'm all alone. i'm on my knees, you know.
i think it'll take a miracle to get me to quit smoking. now i feel so retarded, but just now i couldn't think about anything else. i bought a pack and smoked like 8 sticks before i reached home. i haven't smoked for so long (which is supposed to be good) that now my brain's going all mad. i think of something and suddenly it just flashes accelerates through my head and disappears a couple of seconds later. punch me. i should punch myself. it' so stupid, to kill myself this way.
i'm just really confused. about what to do, even when the answers are really staring me in the face. because what's right isn't always what i want. and that's why i'm so screwed up.
i feel so screwed up. rather, i am really screwed up. everyone's right. somehow i put on this fake outer layer all the time and feel so obgliged to show that i'm this nice person who does his best, tries to study (at least during the schooling days), but inside it's all upside down.
watched alfie today. which i think was actually a very good movie. but it really pulled my strings, brought up some serious memories. i'm living my life in denial; it's over 2 years but whenever someone says her name i just can't help but think about it. i think this is what happens when you really love someone, or rather loved. and her name was printed all over it. the characters screenwise and in reality were so similar too, not literally but figuratively (you know what i mean). but nowadays we've become so distant and pseudo-friendly; i thought maybe we did recently become friends again but in reality we're nothing but strangers. and that ever since that day i asked her out (purely for the sake of old friends) has she stopped talking to me. and really, i think so hard and wrench my heart for a reason or excuse when really it's staring right at me in the face, that i'm nothing but an obstacle to get over; a defect on an otherwise perfect surface. and i don't deserve to be there. and two years hasn't let me accept that fate yet.
thankfully after the show diana, who is just the nicest friend in the world, gave in and followed me for supper because i was just wandering orchard road aimlessly because i wasn't ready to go home yet. silly i know, but i just wanted some space.
and it led me back to the beginning which is studying overseas. and again i'm telling myself, why did i really have to go there to study? and again i'm fooling myself, that maybe if i really did go to jc it wouldn't have to be this way. and perhaps i'd just be in bmt now, too tired to think about anything else that could clog up my head. yes, it's really stupid to think about the past; to regret life's past; but the words come so easy and yet the actions so hesitant.
there's also this person i like (which denial tells me i don't). but i don't want to think about it. too much thinking will really kill a person.
my spiritual life is also stalling. for the past 2 months it has been quite improved, but nowadays i just read the passage and fall asleep as soon as i'm done. i don't really think about it much; maybe because i'm lazy or that these burdens seem like a mountain next to the rock that's apparently God. i do pray, selfishly at times but they don't seem to be having any effect. right, the bible says that the faithful will be blessed, but i'm only human. help me believe that you're with me, even at those times when it seems like i'm all alone. i'm on my knees, you know.
i think it'll take a miracle to get me to quit smoking. now i feel so retarded, but just now i couldn't think about anything else. i bought a pack and smoked like 8 sticks before i reached home. i haven't smoked for so long (which is supposed to be good) that now my brain's going all mad. i think of something and suddenly it just flashes accelerates through my head and disappears a couple of seconds later. punch me. i should punch myself. it' so stupid, to kill myself this way.
i'm just really confused. about what to do, even when the answers are really staring me in the face. because what's right isn't always what i want. and that's why i'm so screwed up.
20 January 2005
oh crap crap crap crap crap crap crap
i accidentlly left my phone on the desk while i was singing/learning jay songs and my mom saw the picture! she hesitated for a moment then pretended to mumble something about how jay can't pronounce clearly. oh crap crap crap crap crap crap crap dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
i accidentlly left my phone on the desk while i was singing/learning jay songs and my mom saw the picture! she hesitated for a moment then pretended to mumble something about how jay can't pronounce clearly. oh crap crap crap crap crap crap crap dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
16 January 2005
sitting on the floor with sarah outside marche with her og after watching seed of chucky. which was retarded...
at alley bar. me leo jon and kai-lyn. a bit high lol
me leo janice jon kai-lyn again :)
good times in church
emily and i at thai express
the gpmg commanders of 5sir charlie company. buddies, man
a dog tag for sarah which reads "sarah :) cutest 130687"... quite spastic
my aussie babe and i. at pacific cafe in one raffles link
we'd do anything to get outta there...
just because he's soooo cute
church fellas
just some random shots. i take lots of photos. because photos are memories to me, and those photos i keep are the memories i'd love to remember and share forever :)
15 January 2005
heh it's been almost a week since i've updated, and really sooo much has happened. or rather, not happened.
the week (sunday) started off in army, instead of the usual haunt which is church. for once in a really long time i actually missed going to church. it's really amazing how after 1 year 1 month and 2 days of army how much i still dislike, abhor, hate it. ok maybe it's not really that bad, there are times when i've never had so much fun since my secondary school days, but those ocassions are once in a blue moon (literally).
now the OC wants everyone to get ippt gold, which means i have to run 2.4km in 9.44mins or less which is seriously quite a bit faster than my current (maybe you could say 'best') timing of 10.15mins. and i almost died doing that! it's really hard especially when all i do is sleep and sleep and erm sleep :) so it's back to tough training and maybe the end of my army freedom as a sergeant! the stupid OC is threatening to cut all our night offs and day offs and whatever offs and even to the extent of making us come back on saturdays. since the 5 day work week apparently only applies to regulars. heh so unfair! but then again, staying fit is good. otherwise i'll just turn into this super couch potato who just sleeps all day.
and today! today's friday, which means everyone normally books out after the last lesson at 6pm. but noooooo, the stupid oc had to call for a 'meeting' which was really just an excuse to hold us back past our dinner and book out times, to give us a dumb lecture about how we should be really improving our fitness levels; something everyone more or less already knew about this year. and because of that i was late with my meeting with emily. i was supposed to meet her at 7pm to watch 'alfie'! with kai-lyn too (which would be really awkward especially for kl but she had nothing to do) poor girl emily had to wait for me from 7 all the way till 9.45pm! she said she entertained herself by shopping around, eating yakun kaya alone amongst other things. wow i really felt sooooo bad the moment i was free to leave i changed and ran all the way from my bunk to the main road to flag a cab (roughly 1.8km). imagine myself sweating like a mad dog! so i treated her to apple crumble which was rather good at borders cafe and also paid for her taxi all the way home in west jurong. which is really far. at least she got back safe :)
after that met janice, leo, jon and kl at alley bar for some drinks where we spent lots of money for very few drinks. haha but it's good; i don't drink that much nowadays. kl looks really pretty. even emily says so! gosh wth she said if jon ever broke up with kl that she'd go after jon. lol and what, i think i might as well go after kl. haha.
going out for lunch with jane tomorrow. man, i haven't seen her in soooooooooo long and she's supposed to be one of my quite good friends. messaged sarah to read her bible and she asked me to go stone with her in some bowling alley with her og tomorrow. i think she was kidding; don't know if i should go, it'll be so extra! but heh i really have nothing to do so i might just pop by for a while. becayse my family's eating dinner at the newly renovated hyatt cafe, or some sort of event like that.
there's lots of things going through my mind right now. and i'm still rather confused. and my qt hasn't been so consistent lately either. i still remember and think about it everyday, but some days i'm just so tired that i fall asleep as soon as i lie on my bed. but that's no excuse either. sigh i just pray that God'll help me settle all these problems. but sometimes i just don't want to know what's good for me.
the week (sunday) started off in army, instead of the usual haunt which is church. for once in a really long time i actually missed going to church. it's really amazing how after 1 year 1 month and 2 days of army how much i still dislike, abhor, hate it. ok maybe it's not really that bad, there are times when i've never had so much fun since my secondary school days, but those ocassions are once in a blue moon (literally).
now the OC wants everyone to get ippt gold, which means i have to run 2.4km in 9.44mins or less which is seriously quite a bit faster than my current (maybe you could say 'best') timing of 10.15mins. and i almost died doing that! it's really hard especially when all i do is sleep and sleep and erm sleep :) so it's back to tough training and maybe the end of my army freedom as a sergeant! the stupid OC is threatening to cut all our night offs and day offs and whatever offs and even to the extent of making us come back on saturdays. since the 5 day work week apparently only applies to regulars. heh so unfair! but then again, staying fit is good. otherwise i'll just turn into this super couch potato who just sleeps all day.
and today! today's friday, which means everyone normally books out after the last lesson at 6pm. but noooooo, the stupid oc had to call for a 'meeting' which was really just an excuse to hold us back past our dinner and book out times, to give us a dumb lecture about how we should be really improving our fitness levels; something everyone more or less already knew about this year. and because of that i was late with my meeting with emily. i was supposed to meet her at 7pm to watch 'alfie'! with kai-lyn too (which would be really awkward especially for kl but she had nothing to do) poor girl emily had to wait for me from 7 all the way till 9.45pm! she said she entertained herself by shopping around, eating yakun kaya alone amongst other things. wow i really felt sooooo bad the moment i was free to leave i changed and ran all the way from my bunk to the main road to flag a cab (roughly 1.8km). imagine myself sweating like a mad dog! so i treated her to apple crumble which was rather good at borders cafe and also paid for her taxi all the way home in west jurong. which is really far. at least she got back safe :)
after that met janice, leo, jon and kl at alley bar for some drinks where we spent lots of money for very few drinks. haha but it's good; i don't drink that much nowadays. kl looks really pretty. even emily says so! gosh wth she said if jon ever broke up with kl that she'd go after jon. lol and what, i think i might as well go after kl. haha.
going out for lunch with jane tomorrow. man, i haven't seen her in soooooooooo long and she's supposed to be one of my quite good friends. messaged sarah to read her bible and she asked me to go stone with her in some bowling alley with her og tomorrow. i think she was kidding; don't know if i should go, it'll be so extra! but heh i really have nothing to do so i might just pop by for a while. becayse my family's eating dinner at the newly renovated hyatt cafe, or some sort of event like that.
there's lots of things going through my mind right now. and i'm still rather confused. and my qt hasn't been so consistent lately either. i still remember and think about it everyday, but some days i'm just so tired that i fall asleep as soon as i lie on my bed. but that's no excuse either. sigh i just pray that God'll help me settle all these problems. but sometimes i just don't want to know what's good for me.
9 January 2005
this week was pretty crappy. except for the really ridiculous water bomb fight and the crapping on the rooftop at the urban warfare live firing area. and the sessions with ezra (one of the other mg commanders) talking about 'our girl's and so called thing called love. and we both felt pretty crappy. in our shoes, that topic is all down in the dumps. (don't worry we're not gay and not together!)
going back to camp in 2 hours. pray that this week will be better than the last; which i'm sure it most probably will be. something to look forward to; someone, that is. but i'm not really sure. i'm just confused, i guess. someone wake me up.
oh nikki just came online. i asked her if she still used her old hp number. and i asked her if she wanted to go out. and she said 'yeah, but i'm kinda broke'. sheeesh do all girls have to say that? so it's settled. finally after 2 years.
but this week is still shitty. maybe 5% less because of nikki. haha. ok, 10% :)
SIGH
going back to camp in 2 hours. pray that this week will be better than the last; which i'm sure it most probably will be. something to look forward to; someone, that is. but i'm not really sure. i'm just confused, i guess. someone wake me up.
oh nikki just came online. i asked her if she still used her old hp number. and i asked her if she wanted to go out. and she said 'yeah, but i'm kinda broke'. sheeesh do all girls have to say that? so it's settled. finally after 2 years.
but this week is still shitty. maybe 5% less because of nikki. haha. ok, 10% :)
SIGH
2 January 2005
ok this is going out of control. i'm eating dinner in front of the copmuter. fortunately not leftovers, but fully by myself :( i have live firing next sunday, so that's half my outside social life gone down the drain! and it's already 7.53pm, so i have about 3hours 22minutes before going back to camp.
apparently there was supposed to be a field pack inspection, but half-lying me says that my nephew is home and i have to take care of him till my parents come home.
3hours 20 minutes of freedom left. i think i'm going totally insane.
apparently there was supposed to be a field pack inspection, but half-lying me says that my nephew is home and i have to take care of him till my parents come home.
3hours 20 minutes of freedom left. i think i'm going totally insane.
today marks the end of what feels like such a long holiday; rarely do i have week long breaks. gosh i sure do miss the good times of school days when holidays were month long at least and going back to school felt less like a chore but more of a reunion of friends. but lest the day will never come (unless you count university. hoorah! hahaha can't really wait)
this holiday (actually my holiday was only a week long. 23/12-02/01) but i really got to know a lot of people better other than the army chatter i'm so used to (and totally abhor).
i'm so sleeeeeeeepy now i think i'll go snooze. but i don't want to waste any time because i'm going back tonight! army feels like such a prison, i really feel sorry for my sonny gang and the church people who are going in this week. soon they'll be brainwashed and they'll spend the whole week planning what they're going to do on weekends, only to dread sunday nights. hope they don't pick up bad habits.
ok lah. snooze time.
this holiday (actually my holiday was only a week long. 23/12-02/01) but i really got to know a lot of people better other than the army chatter i'm so used to (and totally abhor).
i'm so sleeeeeeeepy now i think i'll go snooze. but i don't want to waste any time because i'm going back tonight! army feels like such a prison, i really feel sorry for my sonny gang and the church people who are going in this week. soon they'll be brainwashed and they'll spend the whole week planning what they're going to do on weekends, only to dread sunday nights. hope they don't pick up bad habits.
ok lah. snooze time.
i feel like shit. because just this morning i set one of my resolutions to be nice. and apparently i've already irritated quite a few people with such minor things.
sigh i hate myself
sigh i hate myself
1 January 2005
browsing through the photos of the tsunami on yahoo, i feel really lucky that singapore is really where it is, in such a sheltered location. and many times we take our safety for granted. indonesia is trashed upside down, and people all the way over in india are affected too. jeff was saying during service yesterday that this could be god's 'wake up call' for those people who have yet to turn to him, but it's so difficult to see how losing your loved ones could make you anything other than a bitter person. step into their shoes, and it's next to impossible.
my mom's also applying hk university for me. i really hope i get in; i was dreaming of food like for the past hour. too bad my chinese is really so crap, but fortunately i meet their requirements which is a minimum of E8 for o levels (i got that! luckily i didn't drop it altogether). and it's also a lot cheaper than australia apparently so i'll feel a lot less guilty.
new year's days are always dull stay-home boring. bleah. the weather's been so gloomy; perhaps reminiscing of the year gone by.
my mom's also applying hk university for me. i really hope i get in; i was dreaming of food like for the past hour. too bad my chinese is really so crap, but fortunately i meet their requirements which is a minimum of E8 for o levels (i got that! luckily i didn't drop it altogether). and it's also a lot cheaper than australia apparently so i'll feel a lot less guilty.
new year's days are always dull stay-home boring. bleah. the weather's been so gloomy; perhaps reminiscing of the year gone by.
it's 2.57am, and i'm home before my 3am curfew :) since when did i have a curfew anyway... hmm actually i always did haha but i never stuck to them so this time i'm being a good filial and considerate son, because after all it is 2005 and i want it all to start well :)
went out in the afternoon with di, daph and emily gan. so her ex-boyfriend didn't want her back after all, which i really thought was the right thing to do albeit being somewhat mean. if she really loved him that much she wouldn't have to go find another guy to figure out that she really loved him. that's what i think anyway. maybe you can say it's about forgiveness, but people are still young and there's lots to life to look forward too. plus the point that i don't believe in long distance relationships, at all.
had lunch at thaiexpress (which rocked!!). i feel like a pig (gluttony is one of the deadly sins after all! lol) because i had mango salad, tom yum soup and green curry laksa almost all to myself! plus i finished the leftovers from emily's phat thai or whatever which was pretty good too! so the bill came to $45 and half of it was mine, even though it was a table for four. haha. and it was realyl spicy so when i poop (nice word) it's spicy and when i fart my ass feels spicy. it's really intriguing.
after that we roamed around for a while, when emily said she needed to find this agency where she would be going for job training as an accountant of sorts. the place was located near raffles city mrt, and on the map it was initialled as 'AEC'. so the both of us walked around raffles city for like so long in these ulu mrt tunnels that i have never been to in my entire life! and when we finally reached we discovered that AEC stood for 'Ah... Eat and Chat!' which is like howwwww dumb lah. hahahaha we were laughing for like a while before we got over it. but fortunately the real place was actually next door, which was some education agency conducting courses.
just got back from yg new years' outing, which was not bad. went to watch 'meet the fockers' which was quite funny! but D really wanted to watch it with me! well, sorry :P i wanted to watch 'seed of chucky' with my youth group instead, thinking how nice it would be to start the new year all jumpy and scared (in a good way!) but i think it's rated m18, and it's certainly not fun to exclude half our youth group! but fortunately meet the fockers was really nice.
before that, about half our group followed sarah to the countdown@boonlay which her friend helped to organise. it was such a letdown - i thought i could take a photo with jenette aw! who is so pretty even in real life but all i could clearly see was her ass which was... ok wasn't too bad :) but i think her face looks a lot better than her ass obviously. sigh. on the bus (thankfully a FREE shuttle bus) sarah and i were listening to jay chou songs from my ipod and boy, his songs are really damn fun to listen to! david tao is just as good but perhaps not as upbeat and fun as jays. and it's good to be happy :)
too bad she fell sick during the movie! poor girl she was shivering like mad in the cinema; wonder whether she actually got to enjoy the show. sarah you better be well when you read this, ok! then in the cab back home, karl was having a sore throat and i was coughing my lungs out! thank God for strepsils! the orange vitamin-c flavour and the lemon and honey is really damn soothing. need to buy more before my throat really comes out of my mouth. everyone's getting sick, it's the festive flu bug!
it's 2005, the new year, and new years are all about setting resolutions. so here's my resolutions for this coming 2005
2005 resolutions
1) read my bible daily, as well as qt journaling. EVEN if people don't remind me, that i have the self discipline to actually remember
2)no smoking (not even out in the jungle, like zero zilch)
3)limited drinking and clubbing. no consecutive weeks! maximum 3 glasses or 3 shots (as to rachel huang. includes rule #2!)
4)be a nice person and an even better friend to those around me. it's important to really realise that other people have feelings too and in the end, it's better be the giver even if the whole world takes you for granted. never give up, it doesn't hurt to be nice. but don't be a pushover!
there's really many other things that i could include, but of course i think being realistic is the most important one :) so here's just 4 to think about and not forget. happy 2005!
went out in the afternoon with di, daph and emily gan. so her ex-boyfriend didn't want her back after all, which i really thought was the right thing to do albeit being somewhat mean. if she really loved him that much she wouldn't have to go find another guy to figure out that she really loved him. that's what i think anyway. maybe you can say it's about forgiveness, but people are still young and there's lots to life to look forward too. plus the point that i don't believe in long distance relationships, at all.
had lunch at thaiexpress (which rocked!!). i feel like a pig (gluttony is one of the deadly sins after all! lol) because i had mango salad, tom yum soup and green curry laksa almost all to myself! plus i finished the leftovers from emily's phat thai or whatever which was pretty good too! so the bill came to $45 and half of it was mine, even though it was a table for four. haha. and it was realyl spicy so when i poop (nice word) it's spicy and when i fart my ass feels spicy. it's really intriguing.
after that we roamed around for a while, when emily said she needed to find this agency where she would be going for job training as an accountant of sorts. the place was located near raffles city mrt, and on the map it was initialled as 'AEC'. so the both of us walked around raffles city for like so long in these ulu mrt tunnels that i have never been to in my entire life! and when we finally reached we discovered that AEC stood for 'Ah... Eat and Chat!' which is like howwwww dumb lah. hahahaha we were laughing for like a while before we got over it. but fortunately the real place was actually next door, which was some education agency conducting courses.
just got back from yg new years' outing, which was not bad. went to watch 'meet the fockers' which was quite funny! but D really wanted to watch it with me! well, sorry :P i wanted to watch 'seed of chucky' with my youth group instead, thinking how nice it would be to start the new year all jumpy and scared (in a good way!) but i think it's rated m18, and it's certainly not fun to exclude half our youth group! but fortunately meet the fockers was really nice.
before that, about half our group followed sarah to the countdown@boonlay which her friend helped to organise. it was such a letdown - i thought i could take a photo with jenette aw! who is so pretty even in real life but all i could clearly see was her ass which was... ok wasn't too bad :) but i think her face looks a lot better than her ass obviously. sigh. on the bus (thankfully a FREE shuttle bus) sarah and i were listening to jay chou songs from my ipod and boy, his songs are really damn fun to listen to! david tao is just as good but perhaps not as upbeat and fun as jays. and it's good to be happy :)
too bad she fell sick during the movie! poor girl she was shivering like mad in the cinema; wonder whether she actually got to enjoy the show. sarah you better be well when you read this, ok! then in the cab back home, karl was having a sore throat and i was coughing my lungs out! thank God for strepsils! the orange vitamin-c flavour and the lemon and honey is really damn soothing. need to buy more before my throat really comes out of my mouth. everyone's getting sick, it's the festive flu bug!
it's 2005, the new year, and new years are all about setting resolutions. so here's my resolutions for this coming 2005
2005 resolutions
1) read my bible daily, as well as qt journaling. EVEN if people don't remind me, that i have the self discipline to actually remember
2)no smoking (not even out in the jungle, like zero zilch)
3)limited drinking and clubbing. no consecutive weeks! maximum 3 glasses or 3 shots (as to rachel huang. includes rule #2!)
4)be a nice person and an even better friend to those around me. it's important to really realise that other people have feelings too and in the end, it's better be the giver even if the whole world takes you for granted. never give up, it doesn't hurt to be nice. but don't be a pushover!
there's really many other things that i could include, but of course i think being realistic is the most important one :) so here's just 4 to think about and not forget. happy 2005!
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